Terry Donahue
Self
Overview
Amid shifting times, two women kept their decades-long love a secret. But coming out later in life comes with its own set of challenges.
Cast
11 people
Reviews
4 min readThe Love That Dared Not Speak Its Name—Until It Had To
I keep thinking about the way Pat Henschel holds her coffee cup. It’s not a prop; it’s a shield. In A Secret Love, the 2020 documentary about her six-decade relationship with Terry Donahue, Pat’s hands are almost always busy—stirring, gripping, tapping the table.
When the camera lingers on them, you can see the veins, the age spots, the way her fingers tremble just slightly. It’s not nervousness, exactly. It’s the weight of a lifetime spent calculating how much of herself she could safely reveal.
The film opens with a black-and-white photograph: two young women in baseball uniforms, grinning. Terry Donahue, a professional player in the All-American Girls Professional Baseball League (the real-life inspiration for A League of Their Own), and Pat Henschel, her teammate and lover. The photo is staged, performative—the kind of image you’d send to family back home.
But the way Pat describes it, decades later, is anything but: "We were just two girls in love, and nobody knew." The line lands like a punch. Not because it’s dramatic, but because it’s so matter-of-fact. Of course nobody knew.
That was the point.
Chris Bolan, the director and Terry’s great-nephew, doesn’t just tell their story—he unearths it. The film is a collage of home movies, Polaroids, and present-day interviews, all stitched together with a quiet urgency. There’s no narrator, no omniscient voice guiding us.
Instead, we get Pat and Terry themselves, their voices sometimes cracking, sometimes steady, always honest. Bolan’s approach is deceptively simple: he lets them talk. And in doing so, he reveals how much of their lives was spent not talking.
Audience Opinions
Audience 7.8/10
"A deeply moving and intimate documentary that honors a remarkable love story with warmth and authenticity."
Viewers are profoundly touched by the real-life love story of Terry Donahue and Pat Henschel, spanning nearly seven decades, and the film’s tender portrayal of their journey. latestnetflix.com's take is that the emotional depth and honesty of the documentary resonate strongly, though some note its pacing can feel slow at times, focusing more on personal moments than broader historical context.
What viewers praise
- Heartfelt storytelling The film’s genuine and intimate approach to Terry and Pat’s relationship leaves a lasting emotional impact.
- Authentic performances Terry and Pat’s natural chemistry and vulnerability make their story feel deeply personal and relatable.
- Historical significance Highlights an important and often overlooked chapter of LGBTQ+ history with respect and care.
- Emotional depth Many viewers find themselves moved to tears by the couple’s enduring love and resilience.
- Beautiful cinematography The film’s visual style enhances the intimacy and warmth of the story.
Common complaints
- Slow pacing Some viewers feel the documentary lingers too long on certain moments, making it drag in parts.
- Limited scope The focus on personal moments may leave those seeking broader historical context wanting more.
- Repetitive themes A few viewers note that the film’s emotional beats can feel repetitive, especially in the middle act.
Recommended for
Documentary lovers LGBTQ+ history enthusiasts Fans of emotional storytelling Those who appreciate real-life love stories Viewers seeking inspirational narratives
Full Plot (Spoilers)
Spoiler warning
This section contains the full plot, including major story reveals. Overview above stays spoiler-free.
Buzz & Rumors
Public reportsPat Henschel started getting calls at the care home. She had only just learned what Netflix was.
In May 2020, a year after Terry Donahue died, viewers tracked the Edmonton assisted-living desk and left messages. Henschel was 91. "It's a little overwhelming. It really is. It knocks me out," she told the Los Angeles Times. "You know, it's just like half of my heart has gone away." The film that caused the ringing is A Secret Love, Chris Bolan's documentary about his great-aunt and her partner of seven decades. latestnetflix.com's view is that Netflix put it up on April 29, 2020, after South by Southwest cancelled the premiere.
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They met in 1947. Donahue was about 22 and catching for the Peoria Redwings of the All-American Girls Professional Baseball League. Henschel was about 18. On the back of an ice hockey ticket she wrote that she had "never read anywhere where a woman loves another woman. I hope you feel the same way, too." Relatives were told they were roommates who could not afford Chicago rent, or cousins. They ran an interior decorating business into the late 1980s. Donahue later consulted on A League of Their Own and, Bolan told the Times, bonded with Madonna over being Leos. , ,
The coming out happened late. Bolan says they told him over rum and Cokes in 2009. "She didn't want to go to the grave feeling like she'd lived a lie," he told TIME. Once they believed they could live openly, he said, they turned into "giddy schoolgirls" dumping "seven decades' worth of stories." Cameras ran from 2013 to 2018, while Parkinson's was already thinning Donahue. They married on her 90th birthday in 2015. She died on March 14, 2019, at 93. , ,
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ghv3-lpFOcc
Ryan Murphy produced. Jason Blum executive produced under Blumhouse Television. Blum told TIME he and Murphy had worked on The Normal Heart and that "the love story between Terry and Pat is an inspiration." Henschel, on camera, is dryer. "I was a long-distance operator. I could always find you." Donahue's line is smaller. "I don't know what happened, but that was it." The official trailer still sells that hush. Two lives. 65 years. One secret. ,
Rotten Tomatoes sat at 100 percent from 45 critic notices, later 46. Wikipedia logged a BuzzFeed dissent from Shannon Keating, who argued the telling had "subtle but insidious homophobia baked into" a straight frame on queer love. That argument is the only real fight the film kicked up. The rest of the chatter was family. Diana Bolan, Terry's niece, crying on an iPhone as she pushed assisted living. Henschel resisting, then relenting, then answering strangers who had just learned two old women in Edmonton had been married all along. , ,
Entertainment rumors and trivia aggregated from public reporting. Treat speculation as unverified unless a cited source confirms it.